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T.Michelle

Forward Forty- Things I Learned While Forty


Well friends I turned the big 41 this month. So many things started becoming clearer once I hit 40. I will take those things with me moving forward. Below are some things I truly learned while living my year of 40!



  1. Family over everything. I have been blessed with family given to me and family I have chosen. I have even found family! Each one of them mean the world to me. Building strong family relationships is the biggest accomplishment anyone could have. It’s hard but worth it.

  2. Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. We are our own worst critics. Learn to stop beating yourself up over things no one cares about but you. No one notices my pudge & if they love me they don’t care. No one is watching you at the gym, just get in there and get it done. People have their own stuff & ain’t worried about you.

  3. Experiences are worth more than things. And this is coming from someone who LOVES things. But the memories I have with my family & friends override any piece of clothing or gadget I own. You can’t take away my most cherished experiences. Priceless.

  4. Fear is a dream killer. Fear of rejection, loss, or failure are obvious dream killers. But fear of success or higher expectations also can kill a dream before you even start. Acknowledge your fears & work through a plan to push through.

  5. Everyone won’t go where you are going. Some people are a lifetime and some just for a season. Let those intended to be there for a short period of time move on.

  6. Call a spade a spade. Address folks, conflicts, or situations immediately. No need to let stress linger. Talk, listen, resolve & move forward.

  7. Everything is not a battle. On the flip side of calling a spade a spade. Is it worth losing your job, relationship, or friendships? Pick your battles wisely friend.

  8. Have Fun! Be spontaneous and do things outside the norm sometimes. Especially with your babies as long as they allow you.

  9. Keep a close circle of friends and cherish those relationships. Those are the people that you may not talk to everyday or see very often but when you do it’s just like old times. The love NEVER fades.

  10. Procrastination is a horrible habit. Probably hard to break that one after 40. LOL!

  11. Don’t get stuck in one spot. Traveling to new places can expose you to new things & cultures. That experience can change the rest of your life. If given an option of a luxury bag versus a plane ticket, surely take that plane ticket friend.

  12. Do it anyway! Do it scared, broke, and do it alone. The worst thing is looking back and wishing you had done it. Take the plunge. No regrets.

  13. Limit your time with negative people. Free yourself from things that bring you down. It doesn’t matter if it’s family or friends. You deserve to live with positive energy.

  14. What’s for you is for you. The best competition is with yourself. Set your goals and create your dreams knowing that what’s for you will come to fruition.

  15. You are allowed to tell people NO! So stop doing things you don’t want to do. You own your life, you set your boundaries. If folks love you they will respect it. Never sacrifice who you really are to make others happy.

  16. Don't dwell on things you have no control over. Don't live in the past. It’s over & it cannot be changed. Don’t live in the future. Constantly waiting to do things until you have more money, more time. Live in the present. You control the present.

  17. There is no such thing as a perfect parent. Sometimes you have to apologize to your children. Show them what respect looks like and the behavior you expect in return.

  18. Be thankful. There are so many others that are worse off than you. Appreciate what you have while you have it.

  19. Love who you are. Confidence in who you are is such an attractive trait. How can you love others without loving yourself? Once you love yourself & embrace who you are; it won’t matter what others think of you.

  20. Saying “I love you” matters. Saying I love you is just as important as showing it. Everyone has very different love languages.

  21. You don’t know everything. And this is okay. Find power in saying “you know, I don’t know that” and enjoy the process of learning something new. We are all forever learning.

  22. Your metabolism goes to shit. You gotta work harder but also talk with professionals. They can help get you back on track.

  23. Self reflection is a powerful tool. It truly helps you to understand yourself and makes YOU a better person! You gain self-awareness, you see things from different points of view, you can learn how to respond and not react, and also start to own your shit!

  24. You are not promised tomorrow. To live does not mean you are alive. It's never too late to live your life to the fullest. That state you want to move to. Do it. You always wanted to visit New Orleans, I bet it's a short drive away. You want to learn a particular subject, learn it! LIVE & then die on Empty!






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